Thursday, October 1, 2009


Firstly, I will say when and if you comment to this, you can make your comment anonymous. No one has to know who you are. The way you do it is simple. When you click comment, there is a drop down box labeled this:

Comment As:

When you look at the options, the option of anonymous is at the very bottom. Just Click on Anonymous.

With that being said, women are always an interesting topic for men even if it is absolutely 100% true that women will never figure out men and men will never figure out women. Considering the fact that I am an engineer by education, I habitually analyze things at work and it is a natural process for me to do it in other aspects of my life. Anyhow, here is the million dollar question.

Considering all of your relationships you have ever had and your current relationships, if there was ONE thing that you CAN NOT and WILL NOT deal with in a relationship, what would it be? Now be careful because some of you may  have had something in your mind that you declared that you will never deal with and ended up dealing with that so please be honest to yourself and anonymous on the blog. Here is a list of things I have come up with. The last option is other. If it is other, please let me know what that is.










J) OTHER_____________________

 I would appreciate your comments and I also want to let you know that Series II will ask the same question to guys so you should tune in.


  1. A guy with no money is fine as long as he has good work ethic- money comes and goes. bedroom skills can be taught. Phsyical attractiveness is somewhat important but not make or break. It's hard to choose just ONE thing that is an absolute deal breaker. I would say Lying/cheating first (even though I've dealt with this in the past when i never thought i would)..but I would also never be with a man who abuses his body by drinking and smoking too much..i'm trying to have my man living healthy for a long time...not dying off at 50 due to some poor life style habits.
    verbal abuse ranks on the list..if a guy talks down to me he's outta there.

    i don't think i'm much help..i can't narrow it down to one if i'm looking for a "complete" package. lol

  2. I think several are deal breakers when you look at the extremes of each one.

    a) If a guy has no money because he doesn't do ANYTHING, then that's a problem.
    b) And someone who had no education probably couldn't relate on the same level.
    c) A guy who's absolutely horrible in the bedroom probably can't be saved - even with lots of help.
    d) And I definitely couldn't be with a guy who's dishonest; I've been down that road before, and it'll drive you crazy wondering what's the truth and what isn't
    e) Attraction is key...without it, you're basically just "amigos"
    g) Can't deal with drinking or smoking too much
    h) and i) If he's never around, then what's the point?

    Of course, there are tolerable levels for each. If a guy doesn't have any money because he's been laid off or is having difficulties finding a job; or has a GED and lots of motivation; or has areas of improvement in the bedroom; or tells the occasional white lie; etc., these are all dealable.

    I think first and foremost are someone who's honest, caring, considerate, attentive and makes you feel special.

    I'm lucky to have found a guy who's all the above and a pretty good writer. :)

  3. My order of toleration is:
    F (NOT A CHRISTIAN) and D (DISHONEST GUY-CHEATING, LYING) are a pretty close first. F – It is one thing not going to church every Sunday or declaring to the world that God is the head of life. I can deal with that. It is a whole different story, though, if you're an atheist or something. I can't deal with that. Plain and simple. No further explanation needed. I read once, “I rather believe in God, die and find out He doesn’t exist than not believe, die and find out He does exist.” D - Man ole man. I don't even know where to start with this one. I'll try and comment as less as possible or else I'll end up starting my own blog. In my opinion, honesty in a relationship (any relationship) triumphs everything. Speaking on a man being honest to a woman---If he's not honest then everything falls apart. I couldn't depend/rely on him. I'd always have a plan B because I there’s no way I can depend on a liar. I couldn't depend on him: to ensure the mortgage will be paid or that our children will always have food to eat, being there before I even hang up the phone when my car breaks down and I'm stranded. Shoot, if he's cheating, I can't depend on him to even answer the phone when I call. I wouldn't feel safe (and I always thought your man was supposed to protect you). I wouldn't know when to believe him and as a result I'd never believe him. He wouldn’t be a man to me and nothing he says would matter or “be obeyed.”

  4. Second - G (DRINKS/SMOKES TOO MUCH). I don’t smoke, so that would be a complete turn off and I wouldn’t even consider being with a smoker. Drinking - I’d think that would go hand and hand with I (HANGS OUT TOO MUCH). I don’t really drink and I can’t remember the last time I went out, so I’d have a problem with being someone who does this stuff on a constant especially if we’re supposed to be in a relationship. Drinking socially is fine but if you have to have a drink every night or you’re throwing up every weekend then we are not compatible. Now, if I was throwing up right with you or getting blowed then maybe this thing could work. Third - H (WORKS TOO MUCH). I’ll be the first to tell you that I’m funny acting. I don’t like to be around a person too long because that will drive me crazy. I’d never be the woman that doesn’t want her man to leave her sight. I like to be alone a lot and I need my space, so working and being out of my face wouldn’t be a problem. When I get lonely though, I’d expect him to be there. I think I’d be mad, if a guy worked so much so that our plans were always cancelled or we never did anything because he was always in the “office.” If that was the case (always in the office), then I’d start convincing myself that he was a D type of guy and the office was just his alibi/scapegoat. 4th - A (NO MONEY). Maybe I should move this up higher on the list. Don’t get it twisted. I’ll pay and I don’t mind holding it down. I’ve been on plenty of dates where I took the guy out and I paid for this and I paid for that. I do that because I want to. If I do that because I have too then that’s a problem for me. I’m just a believer in the fact that the man is the head of the household, the provider, the protector and, to me; you’re less of a man when you can’t do those things. That’s just my opinion. Know I understand special circumstances. I’m not talking about that though. I’m talking about bums. To me, a man is a bum if his woman is working two jobs and he doesn’t have one, if his woman works all day and she comes home and she still has to work, if he won’t humble himself enough to work at McDonald’s to provide for his family. Man look, this is a topic I can go on and on about so I’ll just stop now and hope you get my point. LAST - B (NO EDUCATION). Education is important but I believe you can be non-educated and still be smart and know how to hold a conversation. You can be non-educated and still be successful. C (NOT GOOD IN BED) – I think this is something that can be worked on through COMMUNICATION. E (NOT ATTRACTIVE) – Looks are not everything but If I didn’t find something attractive about the guy then I never wouldn’t have entertained him the day we meet.