Monday, November 9, 2009
THE GRAY AREA PART III – THE GIFT AND THE CURSE….WHAT’S WORSE?
I am only trying to bring light to things that may seem gray to people. I am in no way trying to bash the practices or views of others. The views below and in the Gray Area Series have been compiled over the years. They have previously been expressed by me and those around me, both male and female. I am currently dating and things are going very well.
Have you ever wondered, “What’s the best way to tell a woman I’m not interested?” Or ladies, have you ever wondered the same in terms of a man? I don’t think there is an easy way to say no, but there is a hard way to say yes. Saying yes with intentions of doing the opposite is a very hard way to say yes. True, sometimes, no isn’t good enough, but I was always brought up…no means no. Weren’t you?
Let’s extend this “No” for a moment. If you’re looking for a job, and a recruiter calls you and tells you about this job that seems interesting on the surface. You ask additional questions and then you tell the recruiter to set you up for a phone interview with the hiring manager. Once the manager calls you, you make a quick assessment and determine 1) you’re not interested and would rather wait it out for something better 2) you’re interested.
Let’s examine the above with the following assumptions:
This job matches or is better than what your resume would offer you
The company is not a fortune 500 company
The benefits of this job a far greater that any of your previous jobs
You’re currently unemployed
You have no complaints with the look and feel of the company’s website.
~You’re not interested and rather wait it out for something better
If you haven’t had a job in a few months or have been from job to job over the last year, why would you pass on a job with so much to offer? Why would you feel more inclined with justifying why you’re not working, when you’ve had this opportunity come along? (Haven’t you heard this before, “there aren’t any good available women around.” “There aren’t any good available men around.”)
Well, it’s obvious that those who pass up on this job are so used to the state their in, they don’t recognize the difference between the genuine gold in front of them and something that’s gold plated. True this job isn’t with a Fortune 500 company, but you won’t have to be stuffed in a small cubicle with your manager watching your every move. With a Fortune 500 company, you won’t be able to access the internet and you’re only allowed 30 minutes for lunch. But, hey, that’s the life of those employed by some a fortune 500 companies. That’s what you want, right? Or, that’s what you deserve?
The company wants you...but you’re not interested anymore. I’m sure you would tell the recruiter “No, I’m not interested in this position.” Correct? And if he keeps asking you about the job, you would continue to tell him no, right? No ambiguity there. Maybe you would tell him you’re interested, and when the company calls to make you an offer…you wouldn’t answer right? Would you? Have you?
What’s worse, saying no, or saying yes and really meaning no? Let’s not speak of things we don’t really want…like a good woman (fellas)….like a good man (ladies). Let’s not say we want a Good Company when we really want a Good Fortune 500 Company. Let’s not say no and mean yes or say yes and mean no. A yes, is a yes, and a no is a no…there’s nothing in between. “No” Gray! I’m sure the company who wants you would appreciate it (wink wink).