Friday, September 4, 2009


A condition that many men and women strive for but don't quite know how to handle it when we finally achieve it. You might ask, how can success be a bad thing? Well, I'm not saying it's a bad thing because that's not the right word. I will say it is something that all professionals and successful individuals need to be very "CAUTIOUS" with. There are many different problems that come up on your road to becoming successful that foreshadow what's to come when you are finally there. The issues that will be included in this entry are personal knowledge and will be portrayed as such. Hopefully, some of you can relate.

I. Old Crowd

One really pressing issue is the crowd you are surrounded by. Most successful individuals gradually evolve and adopt a more sophisticated crowd as they grow into their success. That is easy to do when the original crowd is one of understanding. This means that they are not blind and can see where you are headed and are happy for you to move on into a circle of individuals that are right there with you. Let's be honest, this crowd may not truly exist. There are very seldom times where people are genuinely happy to see you succeed outside of your family and your closest friends. This is the first problem that needs to be navigated through. The majority of the crowd that you grew up with and did things with that were typically labeled as "bad" are probably still around and are still in a mindset that allows them to do anything they want because they don't have much to lose. You, on the other hand, now have a career, a profession, a host of employees or co-workers depending on you to be responsible at all times; on or off the clock. You also have the weight of all of your accomplishments on your shoulders; "He graduated from X University and he got into that mess, that is such a waste." Most successful individuals know that old crowd that wants them to be included in some ridiculous activity that years ago they would be completely up for and will surely result in a bad outcome. However, right now, you have to decline to be involved. Is there a price to pay for declining? The people in that crowd that will throw the fact that they grew up with you and you used to be "down" will more than likely call you all kinds of things similar to coward, sell out, weak, etc. You have to be very "CAUTIOUS" with your next move. At this point in your life, do these comments even matter to you anymore? They shouldn't...but they still hurt. These are your "boys!" ...NOT. Remember those who can not see you and what you stand for and always want the best for you aren't and never will be your real boys.

II. People Who Try to Take Advantage

The next problem you face is those that know you are now successful, including family, and know you are a fair and upstanding person and try to take advantage of that. This issue is one that is truly difficult to get through without some lingering guilt. I know some people have experience the cousin or uncle that only calls you when they are broke or their car has broken down and they have no where else to turn but to you. In a lot of cases, they need money. This is very shaky ground because you might have the money for them but this small creek could turn into a flood if you are too easy to loan them the money. The next time any little thing happens, they will call you FIRST before even trying to get the money on their own. It puts you in a bind emotionally, mentally and not to mention, financially. These are the people I grew up with or this is the man that used to take me to the park or zoo when I was a kid.... As hard as it is, you have to be "CAUTIOUS" at this point. Remember, you worked hard to get to where you are. You have stayed up all times of night studying and making the grade to be where you are now. You have your own household to look after now.. You have to say no. If they are your real family and really love you, they will understand. They will also realize that they were wrong to even put you in that position. They will also start to at least think twice before hitting the speed dial button on their phone to call you whenever something breaks that needs fixing. You worked hard for your success; it should not be abused by others with no intentions of giving back to you because in their minds, "you are successful and can just make more money or just buy more of that so why should they pay it back?" Stay away from these situations because you will have to see these people at Christmas time.

III. Finding a Mate

The last issue is finding a mate. When you are a successful person, finding a mate takes on a whole new meaning. Now you are not just a cute guy or girl at the bar; you are a cute doctor, lawyer, engineer, business owner at the bar. Be very "CAUTIOUS"when meeting new people as potential mates that are so so in the conversation until it comes up..."so what do you do again?" Then when the beans are spilled, you are suddenly a match made in heaven. Unfortunately, like P Diddy and Mase said, "the more money we come across the more problems we see." These are the mates you want to stay away from. It is hard for us to do that because you try not to judge people too quickly but why gamble with it at all? You have to find it in yourself even if the girl/guy is "HOT" to walk away. Just like the NFL, NBA, MLB, actors, actresses, etc. do every day of their lives, you too have to watch out for who's around you and who you are in contact with at all times because you can no longer think like you used to think. You are now a rare breed and you must treat yourself as such. "You are the party and they're just the guest list", courtesy of Timbaland.

So to all of my successful colleagues and friends...Be "CAUTIOUS" out there because it is true:

Haters never sleep and misery loves company.....

Til Next B

By: Broderick D. Moses

1 comment:

  1. Agreed for the most part...
    I. Old Crowd, they are in this category for a reason. Growth is a funny thing, b/c it's usually the people closest to you that see your evolution last. The ones that keep you placed in a box, oh he used to be like this or is always doing that or acts funny...these naysayers are the ones that need to go. No matter how successful you are w/ regard to business or self evolution, THEY WILL NEVER EMBRACE IT, so just move on. On the other hand, the "old crowd," though rare will have glimmers of light of those who have been cheering for you. They see your success and they are proud. They celebrate with you. Those are the keepers. They are hard to find and irreplacable.

    II. People who try to take advantage of you - If they are not taking advantage of you, trust me they will find someone else, it's a lifestyle, unfortunately. "You feed a sucker, he'll just turn into a bigger leech." Fabulous

    III. Finding a Mate - "Successful" people may in fact be there own road block on this one. For example, the harder you work, the harder you tend to criticize others. I'm in the company of successful people all the time who want their mates to be X, Y, and Z b/c they've are A, B, and C and have worked so hard to get there. Well NEWS FLASH, everyone has different goals and defines success differently. Maybe, she's content with being a bit thick, driving a Honda Civic and living in her one bdroom apt. But you are looking at her like naw you aren't gonna come up on me. That's a problem. Because she might have just been the SUPPORT you need to get to the next level. And in the instances my successful males friends will accept those criterias she's got to look like a model. Ok that's cool, but guess what, if she does, she's probably been TRADING off her looks and therefore has DOES NOT have an attitude of I'm here to support you, but rather an attitude of I'm here to be a trophey, since clearly, that's what YOU WANT oh and guess what you better keep busting your butt and slaving cause that's HOW YOU GOT ME.

    "man down, holla!"